“In detachment lies the wisdom of uncertainty…in the wisdom of uncertainty lies the freedom from our past, from the known, which is the prison of past conditioning. And in our willingness to step into the unknown, the field of all possibilities, we surrender ourselves to the creative mind that orchestrates the dance of the universe.”

– Deepak Chopra

Travel inspires a level of detachment, in that – often – you don’t know what to expect before embarking on an adventure. Yes, you may paint a picture, which initially drives you to go, but it’s the mystery that we are really committing to. We sometimes get carried away by our expectations, but an experience proves to be most beautiful when you detach from predetermined ideas and let the mystery surprise you. Be prepared, in the most practical and safe sense, yet be open to “the dance of the universe.”

I’ve experimented with this “dance” during my most recent solo travel experience in Costa Rica. After 6 years of solo travel, jobs around the world, and creating a sense of home in Hawaii, I returned to Costa Rica to build an itinerary for my travel business, Lift Life Travel. I also returned to revisit myself, at the start of my solo travel life. I returned to rediscover her – that spirited, independent woman, eager for the world.

I went to Costa Rica with “active detachment,” as Deepak would say. Detached from expectations, but open for opportunities to come my way, ready to act on them when they felt authentically true to my path.  In other words, I left my plans open. I didn’t book accommodations ahead of time, but rather, planned my stays day by day, feeling out what made sense according to my business drive and my personal needs. This allowed me to determine how much time was needed to visit each place, and gave me time to stay and connect with an area if it drew me in. It also gave me freedom to move on if a place wasn’t exciting to me. I also practiced playing with my intuition. When I was presented with a decision, I would pause, think, listen to what my deeper self was telling me, and then move forward from there. By doing this, I made decisions that were authentic to me, rather than responses that may please others, or responses that I thought I “should” do in order to blend in. If I was tired, I rested. If I was presented with a challenge, and felt the challenge may be beneficial, I would charge forward. If I was offered something I didn’t want, I declined, even if I feared it might displease someone. I realized it was ok to say “no.” It was okay to take care of myself, so that I could show up for others in an even bigger way than before. I learned how to say “yes” to what I learned was truly good for me, and paid attention to what I gained from really knowing when to say yes and no. I grew to understand what it meant by being unattached to outcomes, not predetermining what I should do, and instead trusting myself to carry on authentically as life presented itself to me.

With this practice of “active detachment,” I built an itinerary that sold out in a week, I made friendships that built me back up, I made connections for the business, I discovered new-found passions for surfing, aerial silks, and rock climbing, and I found my spirited self again. All I had to do was follow the “flow” to the universe’s dance and listen to the inner compass of my authentic self.

But sometimes a greater challenge can come your way, to test your ability to trust and let go…

I returned to Hawaii with renewed energy, and dove into practicing what I had learned about myself in Costa Rica: to love myself by setting boundaries, to surround myself with people who lift me up, to nourish myself with my passions, to stay mentally elevated with fun exercise, to enjoy nature’s gifts, and to have fun with life. I felt high on life, surfing Hawaii’s magnificent coast, improving at challenging skills on aerial silks, sharing exciting conversations, and scuba diving Hawaii’s diverse marine landscape. I thought nothing could stop me…so the universe presented me with a test.

While enjoying the natural infinity pools of the “mermaid ponds,” my car was broken into and stolen. I walked back to my car to find an empty space, as if it was never there in the first place. And it wasn’t just my car that was taken. Preparing for a weekend of adventure, work, and having a gypsy lifestyle anyway, I had every valuable item I owned in that vehicle. Everything from my computer, camera, GoPro, camping gear, rock climbing gear, free diving gear, ukulele, slackline, clothes, toiletries, reusable bags, my journal, sentimental items, my watercolor paints, my shoes, my hats, and my beloved traveling hammock.

Talk about a lesson on detachment….

So I learned. Fortunately, I encountered significant conversations following this incident. I talked to others who had lost everything – sometimes more than once – and quickly gained perspective that I hand’t lost as much in the grand scheme of things. I had only lost things. And there weren’t that many things. Some people lose everything they have invested their entire lives into. Some people lose loved ones. I was told that I would discover that true abundance lies in the heart. I was told sometimes you find your possessions are a burden. I was told that you often gain better things in place of what you lost. My first day of the unfortunate circumstance, I had even spoken the words myself: “There is a gain in every loss.”

I learned to let go and trust. I stepped into “the field of possibility.”

In that field, I was met with much kindness, and many gifts. People gifted me clothes, new toiletries so I could shower, and words of wisdom. Strangers and friends gifted me money and items to replace what was stolen. I often received even better items than before: a nicer ukulele, a more travel-friendly slackline, extra rock climbing gear, a lighter hammock….I discovered how loved and how fortunate I was. I let go, and I received.

I realized through the experience that I was given a “blank slate” opportunity. Having thought of moving away from my home in Hawaii in order to discover new homes, I now had an opening to a new direction to anywhere.

“The art of life is not controlling what happens to us, but using what happens to us.” – Gloria Steinem

Was I sad? Yes, I absolutely loved my car. I probably said, “I love my car,” every day. I valued my possessions. I loved my drives through Hawaii, I loved the constantly changing landscape of Hawaii, and I loved the people that lived there. But I’m looking forward to discovering what else I’ll find in “the field of possibility.”